Why Do You Ask?
Before I get started, I promised someone that I would clarify my references in the last couple of issues relating to the “Jesus Obama Road Show”.
“Why” you ask?
I can see where some of you would think that I was slamming your newly elected president, but if you had paid attention you would see that I was really slamming the “Jesus Obama Fanatics”!
If you missed that point then I suggest you reread them. Ok so maybe there was one reference to the new president being a moron by Probabilius the Psychotic Psychic.
“Why” you ask?
Because if you think about it, anyone who wants a thankless job that will make the whole world, your wife and children hate you and take twenty years off your life in less than four, has to be a moron!
Well… at least we know that the job CAN be done by a moron, as is evident in the last eight year puppet show we’ve had to endure.
Maybe President Obama isn’t a moron. Maybe he really does want to make a difference. Maybe he really will make a difference, but I guarantee you that the Jesus Obama Fanatics will begin to hate him before his third year ends.
“Why” you ask?
Well that will be about the time they figure out that he really can’t turn bottled water into Mad Dog (wine)… bummer.
He really can’t raise the dead… economy… bummer, and he really can’t fulfill even a few if any of his campaign promises… yet another bummer.
“Why” you ask?
Stop asking me that question; I want to get off this subject for crying out loud! Heh, heh Okay here’s how I see it.
Point number one: He can’t turn water into wine because… well because he really isn’t Jesus! You heard me right, he is NOT Jesus nor is he likely to become Jesus in his first three years in office.
That’ll piss off the Jesus Obama Fanatics for sure! Their hopes for a Jesus Obama Tee Shirt and a Jesus Obama Coffee Mug full of Jesus Obama Mad Dog Nog in every home for Obamass 2011… err, um I mean Christmas 2011, will be shattered!
Point number two: He can’t raise the dead… economy by his third year in office because the Jesus Obama Fanatics will have avoided paying billions in taxes by having their Jesus Obama Coffee Mugs, Tee Shirts and gallons of Mad Dog Nog manufactured in some other country feeding THEIR economy while continuing to drain ours!
Bastards!
Point number three: He can’t fulfill even a few if any of his campaign promises because… duh, none of them ever have been able to!
By the time those creepy fanatics get to this point they will have realized that plans for delivery of the boat load of Jesus Obama Look Alike Marshmallow Peeps will now be a complete waste of time, and all hopes to exploit Obeaster 20012 will be in vain! Umm… oh… I mean Easter 2012!
~ Snarp
