Friggen Space Invaders!
Science Fiction is one of my favorite venues when it comes to boob-tube entertainment. I like a good scary movie once in a while too, if it makes me think, however most horror flicks lately just focus on killing and eating your neighbors!
Umm… have you SEEN my neighbors?
Have you seen YOUR neighbors?
Oh no, don’t worry I’m not going to take you there… yeah… your welcome!
Science fiction movies about space adventures intrigue me the most. Not just because I’ve been accused of being from outer space, but because I’d like to think that there are other species out there just a little smarter than us!
Wouldn’t it be grand to talk to some pointy headed alien about how they were able to successfully get rid of all the assbags that were screwing up their world!
After all they wouldn’t be able to gallivant across the cosmos if greedy control freaks were still in charge of THEIR technological advancements.
Perhaps that’s why our various governments want to shoot them out of the sky all the time! God forbid we let them talk to a real human!
But noooo, blow them out of the sky because they’re invading our air space!
Humm… Well there’s another kind of space that gets invaded and it is just as important, if not more so as our air space but doesn’t get nearly enough attention… our personal space, also known as our comfort zone.
Scientific studies show that personal space involves the concept of an invisible bubble around the body, and its size is determined by the individuals need for security.
As far as I’m concerned the only other reason someone should get blowed up for space invasion would be for invading my personal space… hey it’s mine so back the hell up!
What the… wait a minute… is that why I’m getting fatter… to increase my personal space? The more I think about it… the fatter I get the bigger the invisible bubble gets, which means more personal space I can have!
Hmmm… now it is all starting to make sense; all summer long kids have been irritating the hell out of me by standing way too close and talking way too loud all the while sticking baby doll butts or half eaten food in my face!
Kids don’t care about personal space, in fact I’m sure they high five each other when they see they’ve successfully violated our personal space causing us to get fatter to increase our invisible bubbles!
Hmmm… I guess now we should call these “fat bubbles”, and not so invisible!
And some skinny people say they have been irritated by ME this summer, claiming I was standing way too close and talking way too loud!
I’m crushed… I’m not a friggen space invader! I’m just getting older and a little hard of hearing and have a bigger fat bubble so get over it skinny people… I’m just moving in closer so I can hear you!
If you want more space… gain some friggen weight which gets you a bigger “fat bubble”… hey it works for me!
~Snarp
www.snarpfarkle.com
